(Day 124): Hi. I missed you.

Well, well, well. Look who the cat dragged in. 
It’s been a while, hasn’t it? I guess, I’m too caught up in summer class (and a lot of Pokemon) to really think of this blog right now 😦

So, I think I’ll just post my first ever paper in summer class that I did for Psychology. It’s about this “date” I had with one of my psych classmates, who I have never met before this class.

Enjoy! Or don’t enjoy. :> 

I did not have a lot of expectations with this activity, as I really did not know what will happen. I met Dominic once before in class, during the OCEAN activity when we were in the same group. We did not really talk much then, just shared among the ourselves what was asked of us. All I knew of him then was his name, that he was a bit of an introvert, and scored high in ‘Neuroticism’ (like me!). I did not know how two introverts would talk about things as if they knew each other for the longest time. I had my fair share of awkward moments with some of my introverted friends back at home, and we already knew each other for like what, 10 years then? On the day we set up to talk, I wasn’t nervous or anything. It just felt, weirdly enough, normal. Then, I found myself sitting in front of a stranger, a guy I had Psych class with, and among the other “dates” around us. 

Things were not as awkward as I thought it would. I found myself being comfortable around Dom that I would actually share some bits about myself now and my life before Ateneo. The things we talked about ranged from “where are you from?” to“[what’s your course]?”, the usual questions, but as we talked more, we found that we somehow opened up to each other a bit, that I actually told him of my [hopeless]ness in a certain aspect in my life that I would rather forget when he told me about his “love life, [it’s non-existent]”. 

The conversation we had was quite fun, really. I really enjoyed myself, despite really meeting the guy just that afternoon. We had a few silent moments here and there, with “[what else can we talk about]?” in between, but we went with the flow, and had a very normal conversation. I think I never laughed as hard as I did in the past 2 weeks until we had did this activity.

I guess, I recently became that kind of person who easily gets comfortable with the new people they meet. Maybe it’s because when I came here, I knew almost no one. I was a very shy kid back in high school, so I had to change and be a bit more out there and meet new people to survive college, which I’ve been doing for months now. It wasn’t really bad. I think that is why I thought that this little arrangement was “normal” for me, when it really was not. Normally, I would not venture out of my comfort zone, and would rather just hang out with people I already know, than meeting new people. Of course, I could not do it here, as I was the only one from my batch who went to the Ateneo. 

I was also that kind of person who could easily trust a person who I am comfortable to talk to. Like what happened with our conversation, that was the first time I talked about my [hopeless]ness to another person. I was a bit shocked myself, when we ventured to that topic and I just shared it with him. I guess I was open to the idea that, here was a total stranger, was asked to listen to me talk (and vice versa) about anything, and would not judge me about it, since he did not really know me at that level yet to judge. I think if I said that to any of my close friends, I think they would react differently than how Dom reacted. 

Talking to him took me back to my Neopets days, when I could go for hours talking to faceless strangers on the internet. I even made a few friends there that I still keep in touch with today. I recently found 2 of the best Neofriends I had back then on Facebook, and I am glad to report that we still clicked like Lego pieces.

It was hard at first, to just talk to a stranger, but once you get into the flow, it was really easy, comfortable even, and it would really relieve someone (me) of the weight that they’ve been feeling for some time now (again, me). I think that talking to random strangers about what I felt, providing that it was a somewhat secured environment (I could not just simply tell my inner most feelings to the guy I stand beside in the LRT, right?), provided me with this sense of honesty, to me and to the person I’m talking to. The fear of that person could judge you because of it would go flying out the window. I do not know what others would think of it, but that was what I felt. 

I, personally, could not take brutally honest people. My friends were those kinds of people. They weren’t afraid to hurt my feelings because they already knew me enough to think that my feelings would not get hurt. And I admit, that although I do get hurt at times, but I could just as easily forgive my friends for being the way they were, even if it was obviously tactless of them. I would get a totally different reaction from those who do not know me that well. From experience, they would sympathize then offer advice, then relate it with their own experience. My friends, [they would either get angry or laugh at you before the sympathize]. That’s friendship for you. 

Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends, but having this activity made me realize that it could be a wonderful, eye-opening experience to just talk to someone who you does not know quite well (and vice versa) and you could just be yourself with them. Although I’m not saying that a person should completely bring down their walls for it, but it is just the experience of just being yourself around that person would be a totally different experience than just talking to someone you are already comfortable with.


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